The Thug Life

 

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New Kitchen Cabinets

Jolene had been wanting new kitchen cabinets for a long time, but her husband insisted they were an extravagance.

She went to visit her mother for two weeks, and when she returned, she was overjoyed to find that beautiful, new cabinets had been installed.

A few days later, a neighbor came over to visit. After admiring the new kitchen storage cabinets, the neighbor added, “All of us were so glad that the fire your husband had while you were gone was confined to the kitchen.”

The Abnormal Sperm

Cheer Leaders Bring It On!

Trouble sleeping

The woman seated herself in the psychiatrists office. "What seems to be the problem?" the doctor asked.

"Well, I, uh," she stammered. "I think I, uh, might be a nymphomaniac."

"I see," he said. "I can help you, but I must advise you that my fee is $80 an hour."

"That's not bad," she replied. "How much for all night?"

The Sky Fall Victim

Home Alone Shirt for Christmas

Annoyed Ex-Boyfriend

The soldier serving in Hong Kong was annoyed and upset when his girl wrote breaking off their engagement and asking for her photograph back.

He went out and collected from his friends all the unwanted photographs of women that he could find, bundled them all together and sent them back with a note saying, "I regret to inform you that I cannot remember which one is you -- please keep your photo and return the others."